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This song is sung to the tune of Le Toreador from Carmen.

Eddy: Iiiiiiii am the man,

Who makes the scam,

You'll never guess,

What I'll have planned!

There's many things,

I try build,

An igloo chilled,

A stadium filled!

Kevin: I want to punch him,

kicking should do good.

Why can't he act

Just like he should!

No scamming,

Or conning

For a Jawbreaker.

I think I'm gonna scream!

Eddy: This is the best,

My latest scam,

Ed's career test,

Beats all the rest!

Kevin: No!

Eddy: A Ffve star meal,

Of garlic eel,

A record deal,

A date that's real!

There are so many people to scam,

Kevin, Sarah, even my dad!

Carwash, laundry, detective, repairman,

I'm the man with the plan!

Hey!

Kevin: It's that Eddy,

Always ready.

For his conning,

And even bombing.

He's kinda mean,

A little fat,

Just wait 'til he cons you out of your money and runs down to the candy store for a big round_

Japan Jawbreaker!

This scam stinks!

I can't stand those hicks!

I can't believe this taco smells like fish!

(Money!)

Those stupid hicks! (Money!)

Tastes like shhheep! (Money!)

Why would anybody buy a taco fish?

Eddy: There are so many thinks to make!

(It stinks, I just want some oxygen!)

A hat store, or a chocolate cake!

(Those hicks, I just want some oxygen!)

And everyone I have to scam!

That's why I'm called the man with the scam!

Hey!

My own life I'll even stake,

Just so you won't know it's fake!

A hot spa's sauna,

The natural fauna,

The man with plan!

Club Ed,

Ed Land,

Toll moat,

Ride a boat.

An ice cream truck,

Who gives a ffffffree

Pet Boutick,

Can't wait to buy!

Gelatin pool,

Eddy's Creek Cruise,

Man with the scam,

Man with the plan!

Hey!

Kevin and Sarah: We're not spending anymore! Hey!

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